Today is my 40th birthday and the first day of the "Year of Me". This was supposed to be my opening line for my first post but true to form, it is now 4 days after my birthday and this is the first time I have had a moment to myself! Admittedly, it's not a great start to "The Year of Me" but I have no intention of giving up. If nothing else, this serves as a reminder to be ever vigilant in my quest to take my 40th year and turn it into something extraordinary.
I know, this is a big claim and I will put it into perspective for you. I am a mother of 3 daughters and a wife of 11 years so just committing to this blog adds extra value to my life. I don't plan to join the Peace Corps and save lives or anything; I'm hoping over the next year to learn how to transform the mundane into the extraordinary in my daily life.
My husband threw me an amazing 40th birthday bash. We got dressed up, had a bartender and a sophisticated drink menu - martinis and Painkllers - mmmmmmm. Whenever someone would ask me what my plan was for the next year, I would relay this story from earlier that day.
I decided to book myself some spa services to get out of the house and let my husband do his thing in preparation for the party. I wanted a pedicure because I love them, then ended up adding a manicure, massage and hair styling. When I got home, all I had to do was throw on a dress and look fabulous. Each different person I saw at the spa asked me if someone had bought the treatments for me as a birthday gift. Each time I responded with the same answer "No, I booked it myself." I got a variety of responses from surprise to approval but it made me realize that I have spent too many years waiting for someone else to figure out what I want and give it to me. It's time to take matters into my own hands and make things happen for myself.
"The Year of Me" is not about material things or being selfish, it's about making time for the things and people I love, recognizing the things that bring me joy and pursuing them with full vigor, celebrating my life and all it's minutia, opening myself up to the important relationships in my life and becoming more vulnerable and most importantly for me, embracing the unexpected (not my forte). Don't get me wrong, if I see a great pair of shoes that I can't live without (and there is money in the bank) I will get them. What I will also do, though, is stop buying or doing things that aren't exactly what I want. I would rather go without than spend a penny on something just because it will suffice. Ugh. I would rather have someone respect me for my integrity and authenticity than be liked for being someone that I'm not.
My goal for this first month is to recognize how I have turned my own life into a chore. Have you ever noticed how many times you use the following phrases:
"I have to....."
"I need to....."
"I just...."
I have marginalized my own life through my language and I realize that this will be how my 3 year old learns to see the world. Time to make a change. I don't know if anyone out there finds themselves using these phrases a lot but here is my plan. I will replace them with these gems:
"I am going to..."
"I will....."
"I intend to...."
Sounds corny, I know, but corny and cheesy are part of what I plan to embrace over the next year. They add some much needed humour and relief from the tension of being alive. In fact, I may actually test the boundaries and see how far I can push myself and the people around me to embrace the cheese and corn in their lives. I'm talking about more than just listening to Journey when no one is around. I am going to openly celebrate all the things I secretly love but don't want anyone to know about. Like McDonald's. I know it's really bad for me but I have to eat there! It's a compulsion and the fries make me happy. I make up for it by working out with Jillian Michaels. She's another one of my secret loves. I can't get enough of her! While I am in the mood for confessions, I also love Sci Fi, rap music, Jane Austen and Michael Jackson. I also discovered this year that I love detective novels. I think I owe it all to "Castle". I will mull that one over while reading my next Michael Connelly novel.
In closing and celebration of my first blog post and anticipation of what the next year will bring I have compiled a short list of corny songs to get me through the week. Feel free to add your own, they will go into my playlist.
"Africa" - Toto
"Babe" - Styx
"Delta Dawn" - Helen Ready
"Don't Stop Believin'" - Journey
"Every Rose Has Its Thorn" - Poison
"Girlfriend in a Coma" - the Smiths
"Glory of Love" - Peter Cetera
"I've Never Been to Me" - Charlene
"The Living Years" - Mike and the Mechanics
"More Than a Feeling" - Boston
"Never Surrender" - Corey Hart
"Sailing" - Christopher Cross
"To Be with You" - Mr. Big
"You Raise Me Up" - Josh Groban
I wish I had some clever parting thought but I don't. This next year will be a journey for me and this post is my very first step. I am excited and anxious but more than anything, I am curious about where this road will take me.
